The NFL season starts tonight (in less than 3 hours, in fact). With that, it’s time to crush your man again. The odds come to us from Bodog.com via Yahoo, and my early-season commentary should prove to be as inane as ever.
Sept. 7 –
Miami (+1) @ Pittsburgh – No Big Ben, no win for the Stillers.
Sept. 10 –
Denver (-4) @ St. Louis – AFC dominance continues unabated
NY Jets @ Tennessee (-2.5) – When in doubt, remember that the J-E-T-S S*CK SU*K SUC*!
Atlanta @ Carolina (-5) – Michael Vick STILL is not a passer, and Carolina is easily the class of the NFC
Cincinnati (+1.5) @ Kansas City – The BenGALS made a believer out of me last year.
Seattle (-6.5) @ Detroit – Somebody has to win this not-so-classic matchup of a Super Bowl loser and Duh Lions.
Philadelphia (-6) @ Houston – Layeth the lumber.
Baltimore @ Tampa Bay (-3) – Actually, the under 34 is a better bet than taking either team sans the half-point.
New Orleans @ Cleveland (-3) – See above. The NewBrowns could finish with 6 wins in any NFC division.
Buffalo (+9.5) @ New England – Neither team has a defense, so take the over 41 as well.
Chicago (-4) @ Green Bay – Over/under on calls for Mike McCarthy’s head – 10:22 left in the 3rd quarter (and put me down for the under, though my calls are for Wile E. Thompson’s head)
San Francisco (+7.5) @ Arizona – You may like the points, you may want the points, and if your man is honest, you’ll get the points, but you’re not gonna need them. Warner’s over the hill.
Dallas (+2) @ Jacksonville – I’m not taking Dallas just because I have She on my fantasy team; really, I’m not.
Indianapolis (-3.5) @ NY Giants – Why, oh why couldn’t the defenses just crush both Mannings?
Sept. 11 –
Minnesota @ Washington (-4.5) – It will be a 3-way battle for last in the NFC North.
San Diego (-3) @ Oakland – Two letters; LT
(Cross-posted at TheWisconsinSportsBar)
Looks like your season is off to a rocky start..you forgot the zebras BTW.
So I go 15-1 :-)
Seriously, I usually suck Week 1. Last year was an abberation.