No Runny Eggs

The repository of one hard-boiled egg from the south suburbs of Milwaukee, Wisconsin (and the occassional guest-blogger). The ramblings within may or may not offend, shock and awe you, but they are what I (or my guest-bloggers) think.

Archive for August 15th, 2008

Suddenly, The World Comes into Focus!

by @ 17:39. Filed under Miscellaneous.

I never really understood how people who were at opposite ends of the beauty scale, could ever find themselves as a “couple.”   With the exception of my marriage to Mrs. Shoe which was of course, due to the fact that she felt an obligation to  man kind and sacrificed herself so that other women could live without fear of me stalking them, I never saw why attractive women would marry schlubs of a husband.  

Now however, through the wonders of modern science, we have the answer.   The results of two new studies:

The Pill may put you off smell of your man and ruin your relationship

with

Beer goggles really do work, new research suggests
 
suddenly provides all the information you need to understand even the most extreme of relationships.

Julia Roberts with Lyle Lovett used to really bother me. I’m looking forward to my first good night’s sleep in about 15 years!

Eggs is Back!

by @ 7:32. Filed under Miscellaneous.

And what was Silent E doing on his last night in charge?

Well, if he says it’s OK, it must be!

by @ 5:35. Filed under Miscellaneous.

You’ve probably heard about the Burger King employee in Xenia, Ohio who took a bath in the restaurant’s washing sink. He filmed the event to be used for a viral video. You may also have heard that he and other employees who watched this event have been fired.

What you may not have heard is that the bather refers to himself as “Mr. Unstable” and he insists that the Burger King where he bathed is a “totally a safe place to eat.”

I believe him!

What I’m trying to figure out is how it could have been a safe place to eat while he was working there?

Never Fear, Tim is Here!

by @ 5:07. Filed under Politics - Minnesota.

Tim Walz is one of Minnesota’s Congresscritters.   Walz, a Democrat represents Minnesota’s first congressional district which is the  South end  of the state abutting Iowa.   Included in the district are  the cities of Rochester, Mankato, Austin (Home of Spam!) and the home of my collegiate Alma Mater, St. Peter.

St. Peter, like many other cities across the country, is having a tough time making ends meet this year.   The biggest  culprit is the dramatic increase in energy costs that have made things like operating fire trucks, much more expensive than a year ago.

Enter Tim Walz.

Congressman Walz knows just how to fix the problem with the increased fuel costs: give the cities more money from the Federal budget!   Walz doesn’t want the cities to have to make difficult choices:

“What we don’t want is, we don’t want our fire fighters making that choice training or fuel. We don’t want to see them out fundraising again just to put fuel in their vehicles.”

Um, Tim? May I call you Timmy?

You’re solution to keep cities from making budget decisions is to just give them more money? Gosh, why didn’t I think of that? Oh Yeah, it’s because that’s a horrible answer!

Timmy, how do you think my family is dealing with the increase in energy costs? Hint: I don’t get paid more just because I have to spend more. Com’ on, I know you can figure this out, you’re a Congressman after all. That’s right, we have to change our budget! We don’t get to spend as much on other things as we used to because we need to spend more on our fuel costs.

I know, you’re going to say that you support increased drilling (I heard you got permission to say that from Nana Pelosi.) You’ll probably even tell me that you have signed on to a “Bipartisan” bill that would do just that. Thanks for playing Timmy, I took that bill apart a couple of days ago here. The only thing that bill would expand would be the noses on the faces of Democrats who try to sell it as a bill that would increase drilling.

Timmy, rather than just printing more money to put a band aid on a problem, how about doing something that would actually bring down fuel costs for everyone? Can you guess what I might be referring to? Yup, sign on to that discharge petition and get a straight up and down vote on expanded drilling!

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