No Runny Eggs

(H/T – the head barkeep)

Per the Milwaukee Journal Sentinel, the Milwaukee Brewers and pitcher Jeff Suppan will be announcing Monday that they, along with the USO, will give all active-duty military personnel and their families free admission to the rest of the home games. ‘Tis all good.

I haven’t checked my bracket since Davidson shot it full of lead on Friday, but this tournament has made history, as all the #1s have made it to the Final Four. Unfortunately for those of you who took Kansas or North Carolina to be the first #1 out, that game will be the nightcap on Saturday. Those of you who took Memphis or UCLA, or haven’t voted yet, you’re in luck.

Thanks to a choke job by Bruce Pearl, I finally lost my first Final Four team last night (I usually lose the first one on the way into the Sweet Sixteen). That really put a hit on my bracket, which now has more holes than horse-trader’s mule. The good news is, if Wisconsin beats them all, I’ll beat all the Morons. The not-so-good is I’ll still need help to beat the Bar.

Those of you who took North Carolina or UCLA to be the first #1 out, start praying that Kansas and Memphis don’t choke. If you didn’t vote, Kansas is scheduled to tip first tonight at 8:40 pm, followed by Memphis scheduled at 8:57 pm. Tomorrow, UCLA opens it up at 5:40 pm, followed by North Carolina at 8:05 pm. Word to the wise; if you think we’ll have an all-#1 Final Four, wait until we know which two teams go first. Of course, if we don’t, you’re out of luck.

Today was Cinderella Sunday, as not one, not two, but three Cinderellas won. Of course, the fact that two Cindys would win was guaranteed because there were two 12-v-13 matchups. Still, Davidson had its biggest game of its history in knocking off Georgetown. The bad news for them is they get Bucky on Friday, known around The Bar as the Terminators.

Despite there being three lower-bracket teams in the Sweet 16, we only had three “upsets” in the second round, and one of those can’t really be called an upset because it was a #5 knocking off a #4. It was a rough weekend for the #2s, as a pair of them got rejected and the other two got the stuffing scared out of them.

For those keeping track of conferences at home, the Big East and the Pac-10 each have 3 teams, the “down-year” Big Ten and the Big 12 each have 2 teams, and the “all-mighty” ACC, the “almost-all-mighty” SEC, the “used-to-be-mighty” Atlantic 10, the “stripped-bare” Conference USA, and the mid-major twins (Southern, Sun Belt) each have 1 team.

Incredibly, despite going only 21-11 in the first round and 10-6 in the second (including three games that were dead to the bracket), I’m set to do some serious damage in the later rounds as I’ve only lost two of my Elite Eight and my Final Four is still intact. I don’t remember a year when I could say that after the second round.

I need to stay positive after a Day 3 that saw another Elite Eight drop and me go 5-3 (including the dead game that didn’t see Kansas choke). Let’s see…

– Wisconsin won.
– My Final Four is intact.
– I’m above .500.
– In both pools (the WSB and AoSHQ), if Wisconsin takes it all, I should win.

Of course, there are the negatives…

– I’ve lost 5 of my Sweet Sixteen teams (with a pair of dead games today) and 2 of my Elite Eight.
– The first round was an unmitigated disaster, which put me well behind the curve.

Somebody, remind me to put up the “Which #1 drops first?” poll if North Carolina and Memphis both make it into the Sweetness.

Day 2 was pretty much the same as Day 1. One less loss, but I’m down to 13 of my Sweet 16 and 7 of my Elite 8.

I guess I know what song will be on Monday’s Morning Scramble.

The regularily-scheduled bracket coverage will be found at TheWisconsinSportsBar today. That is all on the Moldy Mozzarella front.

This will be bumped as necessary, so there may or may not be newer posts below. I’m getting this started at 1:50 pm 3/20/2008.

1:50 pm – So far, not too much damage. Kansas simply crushed Portland State; not unexpected so no real commentary there.

Xavier came back to beat a very game Georgia; that final doesn’t reflect just how in control the Bulldogs were most of the game.

Unfortunately, there was some damage. Michigan State survived an ice-cold Neitzel to knock off Temple to take out one of my 12-5 upset specials. At least I wasn’t stupid enough to have Temple surviving the weekend.

6:12 pm – Unlike previous years, I didn’t wait until Day 2 to have my bracket become number 2. I lost my Cinderella (badly), and none of my other upset specials (Kentucky, Baylor) survived. At least Pittsburgh didn’t disappoint.

8:38 pm – About the only good thing is I don’t have to extend the Suicide Watch to North Carolina and the patriarch Ham (it’s already been issued for MK). There’s also the fact I’ve yet to lose an Elite Eight team, though I’m already missing a Sweet 16. That was very close to an 0-3 early-evening performance, as Belmont gave Duke all they could handle, the Aggies gig BYU, and K-State gives us the first actual upset of the tourney.

11:13 pm – Who said it was a down year for the Big Ten, and why did I listen to them? The Badgers and Purdue make the Big Ten 3-0 in the tourney so far, and I missed two of those. The Boilermakers were the last game I missed tonight, as UCLA almost tripled up on poor Mississippi Valley State, my first 7-10 split came in with West Virginia, and the Golden Domers take out last year’s Cindy.

10-6 on Day 1, one of my Sweet 16 teams toastified. Not my usual Day One performance, but considering my 2008 performance to date, not too bad.

Selected highlights (soon to be lowlights) of the Bouncing Mozzarella bracket:

– You heard it here first; Wisconsin 63, Memphis 62 in the championship.
– Sorry, Hams (Georgia) and Care Bears (Marquette), for the first-round exits.
– The yearly 7-10 splits: Butler (#7), Davidson (#10), St. Mary’s (#10), West Virginia (#10)
– The first #1 gone; Kansas missing the Sweet 16 to the benefit of this year’s weak Cinderella, Kent State.
– Sorry, Bruce Pearl. We still love ya in the land of cheese and beer, but the road to a Bucky championship goes right through you in the national semi-final.
– There will be 5 opportunities to chant, “Beat (UC)LA!”
– The highest seed to drop in the first round: Vanderbilt.

There’s still time to try to beat me. The Bar and The Morons still have room in their brackets, and they close at tipoff at 11:20 (probably a few minutes early).

“If I have to be remembered because of statistics then I did something wrong along the way.”

  Brett Farve at the press conference announcing his retirement

“Come on guys; I answered like eight questions. We’re running late."  

Barack Obama at his first unfriendly press conference.

I suppose the good news is neither Hendrick nor Toyota took the race. Random thoughts:

– Why would Robbie Gordon go from Ford to Dodge? I mean, Dodge is the ugly red-headed stepchild of NASCAR now that Toyota’s in with Gibbs. Wait, I just answered the question.
– Maybe Hendrick Motorsports isn’t so invulnerable after all. Their engines broke before the Duels, Dale Earnhardt Jr’s shift knob broke, then Jeff Gordon’s suspension broke. By the end, the Official Driver of the 2008 Hen¢AR Sprint Cup season had nobody left to help him.
– The Toyotas are pretty damn strong. They’re the only cars that could routinely pull off single-car moves up through the field. Guess having 15 horses at the rear wheels on the Official Team of Hen¢AR and 30 on the field does wonders.
– The leading candidate to be out at Roush Fenway when they drop to 4 teams is now David Ragan. He’s Kyle Busch without the talent, as he ruined Matt Kenseth’s and my day by mistaking the DeWalt Ford for a vacant piece of Daytona real estate long before the last lap.
– While 465 beats 435, 870 beats 465. Busch the older is a team player, while Busch the younger isn’t. Nice job upsetting the applecart, Penske boys; enjoy the Room of Doom next week at California as Brian and company begins Operation: Vengeance.
– When Tony Stewart finally wins a Daytona 500, will he get a receiving line like Dale Earnhardt did?

Revisions/extensions (8:43 am 2/15/2008) – The US Attorney’s office screwed up in its initial filing; it was in November 2000, not November 2001. Reuters notes that they will be making an amended filing today in the linked story.

According to Reuters:

The allegation came in a legal filing in his steroid perjury case that referred to Bonds’ long-time trainer, Greg Anderson.

“At trial, the government’s evidence will show that Bonds received steroids from Anderson in the period before the November 2001 positive drug test, and that evidence raises the inference that Anderson gave Bonds the steroids that caused him to test positive in November 2001,” U.S. Attorney Joseph Russoniello wrote.

As I said at TheWisconsinSportsBar, I’m shocked, VERY FUCKING SHOCKED he took steroids the year he broke the (single-season home run) record. Pope Bud I should swing for this.

Recapping the piss-poor parlay card after the Giants’ 17-14 win in 42nd edition of The Game That Cannot Be Named (which puts me at 3-8 ATS, 4-7 O/U, 5-6 SU in the post-season):

Patriots -12
Patriots (straight-up) -440
Over 54.5
Team to score first – Giants +130
Will the team that scores first win? – No +190
Team to score last – Patriots -150
Team to punt first – Giants -160
Total touchdowns in the game – over 6.5 -160
Total punts – under 7.5 even
Eli Manning pass attempts – over 34.5 -125
Will Eli throw a pick? – Yes -400 (yep)
Tom Brady pass attempts – over 37.5 -105
Will Brady throw a pick? – No -125
Tom Brady TDs – 6 or more 8/1 (only 1)

I’m calling Obama wiping out McCain in the general right now and fervently hoping that my inability to call jack shit in either the NFL or politics this year continues.

First off, I have to take my hat off to JammieWearingFool, who not only has his team (the Giants) in the aforementioned game, but went 9-1 in the playoffs (bastard!) Well, we’re out of January, so we’re out of my month of discontent (3-7 ATS, 4-6 O/U and 5-5 straight-up) is over. Since the final score will be Pats 62, Giants 13, the obvious bets (courtesy Bodog) of Patriots -12, Patriots -440 straight-up, and over-54.5 are the the ones to take.

However, since this is the Game That Cannot Be Made, and I have to do something to come out of the post-season not dead (or is that buried at the 50 yard line in Jerry Jones’ new stadium?), we’re going into the land of the prop bets, where the profitability can really change.

Team to score first – Giants +130
Will the team that scores first win? – No +190
Team to score last – Patriots -150
Team to punt first – Giants -160
Total touchdowns in the game – over 6.5 -160
Total punts – under 7.5 even
Eli Manning pass attempts – over 34.5 -125
Will Eli throw a pick? – Yes -400
Tom Brady pass attempts – over 37.5 -105
Will Brady throw a pick? – No -125
Tom Brady TDs – 6 or more 8/1

I was going to post a expletive-filled tirade, but the title says absolutely, positively every fucking thing I have to say. 0-2 ATS, 1-1 O/U, 1-1 straight-up (with the -1 part in the game I cared about). The Inveterate Gambler will be back in September, minus a couple knees.

Bring on Spring Training!

We’re at the penultimate Sunday in the NFL season, and we need a sweep to end either half of the formula above .500 after a 2-2 week ATS (and straight-up) and an extra-chunky 1-3 on the over/unders. Oh well; let’s hit Bodog one more time…

NY Giants @ Green Bay (-8/over-41.5) – The forecast is in; cold and not windy. The Game That Cannot Be Named, here we come! Bonus prediction; your final will be Green Bay 31, New York 13.

San Diego @ New England (-14/over-47.5) – Injuries are going to catch up to the Bolts this weekend as the Cheating Pats set a record for most consecutive wins in a season.

Even though nothing is above .500, and the “money” 2/3rds of my playoff predictions slid under the .500 mark, it’s still half-full. Let’s review what went right and wrong:

Seattle 20 @ Green Bay 42 (-7.5/under-43.5-LOSS) – No pick-sixes, but when the Packers either score touchdowns or turn the ball over, and they score six times, it’s almost all-good. Mental note – snow does not stop the Packer offense.

Jacksonville 20 (+13-WIN/over-50-WIN) @ New England 31 – Number of punts – 2. I do believe I told you to take the under-4.5 on that.

San Diego 28 @ Indianapolis 24 (-9.5/under 46.5) – I guess the Bolts just have the Dolts’ number.

New York Giants 21 @ Dallas 17 (-7.5/over 46.5) – I wonder if TO has castrated Romo yet. Stat of the weak – 1-3 against the over/unders. I don’t know the last time I chunked that up that bad.

2-2 against the spread, 1-3 against the over/unders and 2-2 straight-up leaves the playoff record at 3-5 ATS, 3-5 O/U and 4-4 SU. Dammit; I have to sweep the rest of the playoffs to make any money.

…and were looking for me the past hour, I’m at the open thread at The Bar (expect typical bar language).