As Dandy Don said about Monday Night Football, “Turn out the lights, the party’s over.” This is the last week for the regular season, but I’ll be around for the playoffs, where the money can really change hands. I’ll eventually recall how badly I’ve done the last few weeks, but for now, I’ll just go through the last 16 games of the regular season that will result in the Packers drafting 3rd.
Denver (+10.5) @ San Diego – I know Mike Shanahan’s resting his starters in this completely-meaningless game, but 10 1/2 points is too much to give. Now if this were the 5 1/2 that it started off at,….
NY Giants (-8) @ Oakland – The Raiders can’t even play spoilers right.
Cincinnati @ Kansas City (-7.5) – In the end, they’re the BenGALS.
Miami @ New England (-5.5) – Forecast for Foxboro – snow. That’ll cool off the Dullfins.
Buffalo (-1.5) @ NY Jets – Come on, say it with me!
Carolina (-3.5) @ Atlanta – Atlanta doesn’t spoil too well.
Detroit @ Pittsburgh (-13.5) – My pre-season pick for Super Bowl XL champs have their destiny in their hands. Fortunately, even I can hold that destiny against Dick Jauron.
Baltimore (-3) @ Cleveland – The OldBrowns defense isn’t what it used to be, but they still eat rookie QBs for lunch.
New Orleans @ Tampa Bay (-13.5) – The Bucs control their own destiny, and except for Houston, so do the Saints. In short, lay the very heavy lumber.
Seattle (+4.5) @ Green Bay – Seattle’s 3rd string could beat this team. In fact, they probably will as Mike Holmgren pulls his 2nd string in the 4th.
Arizona @ Indianapolis (-6.5) – Arizona’s no Seattle, Denny Green’s no Holmgren, and this one is at home sweet dome.
Houston @ San Francisco (+1) – How in the hell are the Texans favored? They HAVE to lose this game (or hope against hope that New Orleans, the Jets and Green Bay win earlier in the afternoon) to win the Reggie Bush Sweepstakes.
Tennessee @ Jacksonville (-3.5) – I know not who’s starting at QB for the Jags, but I know who’s not going to win.
Chicago @ Minnesota (-4) – Expect one last heavy dose of Kyle “Jack” Orton. Bet accordingly.
Washington (-7.5) @ Philadelphia – If you made this prop bet that it would be the Redskins playing for a playoff spot instead of the Eagles at the beginning of the season, show me your stub.
St Louis (+12.5) @ Dallas – By the time they kick this one off, the game will be meaningless to everyone except gambling degenerates (so I’ll be watching closely).
